The Dilemmas of Being a Woman...and Christian

In today's lifestyle there are several reasons why women are either single by choice, single again or widowed at a young age. Many of these women are struggling to live a Christian life and they have the forces of the world beating them down daily. Economics make up a large portion of problems for single parents. Loneliness is faced daily. Work obligations enter into the lives of the parent and the children and there never seems to be enough hours in the day. Then there is the ever problem of living a life where God calls for purity in our life in all areas.
The single life gives us a unique time and opportunity to work on our own personal self, develop a variety of relationships and a variety of ways that we can serve in the church. However, single women particularly, face a "stigma" in the church. Since "people will be people"; this will likely never change. Single women must constantly take care of their behavior, their dress, their associations and every word that is spoken from their mouth if they are to live a separated life and maintain respectability. God's word tells us that a good reputation is worth more than fine jewels. It is priceless yet it is constant maintenance and dedication to achieve.
Many churches offer their own single groups for Sunday School and fellowship. The success of these groups in accomplishing the job of ministering and discipleship of the single woman is often the success or failure of a godly leader. Often it is difficult to find such a leader, due to the complications and time that a singles ministry requires. Ideally a good group is headed by an older married couple who stand together in responsibility of the singles.
Christian women must often stand alone in the church, maintaining a reputation of a godly life. "Dating around", friendships with married men and not having a quiet spirit can be deadly to the reputation of a single Christian woman.
Our culture often puts the single Christian woman in the fire. However, single or married, we all have the same heavenly Father, the same offer of salvation and the same love from Jesus.
The dedication of ourselves to children and family, if they are in a woman's life is a wonderful basic. The dedication of a Christian woman to a ministry for God will fulfill and sustain as He is molding the woman's life for the future.
Any friendship or dating relationship must be viewed as a possible potential mate and special care must be taken to slowly build and nurture it. Both parties must first have their eyes on the Lord and die to self as far as temptations or the desire to move ahead too quickly.
There are many challenges and victories to the life of a single Christian woman. The opportunity for growth can reach mountain-top peak level or it can bring you into a valley so deep you are tempted to just follow the world and give it up. A godly life is worth the struggle and will be the example for your children as they struggle in a broken family. It is a matter of giving and trusting in God to deliver you up to that mountain-top where the rewards will be worth it

The Act or the Church? Which are YOU?

Do you go to church? Where do you go to church? I remember being in the company of believers hearing them exclaim " I Belong To The Church of.." or "I Attend...." It was as if they had an exclusive membership to a club or something. People will often flock to a church in which the leader is like a celebrity. It seems to bring a sense a pride to member to proudly say "I Attend New Wave Ministries" and "My Bishop Is..." How impressive.
There is nothing wrong with church pride, but church membership is not a promise of salvation. Your faith in Jesus Christ is what gets you into the body of Christ. Belonging to a prominent church with a membership of 1000 or stronger, doesn't mean that church has the monopoly on the teachings of Christ nor are they "THE" path to God the Father. Identifying with a favorite teacher, preacher, pastor or prophet is not good because they are just ministers (servants) of the gospel.
Paul had a similar problem with... the Corinthians (Corinthians 3), rather than identifying with the Body of Christ, the people identified themselves as being apart of Paul or Apollos. Paul referred to this type of behavior as carnal. Who is Paul but a minister (servant) of the gospel?, who is Apollos but a minister (servant) of the gospel? Who is your Bishop or favorite Evangelist or celebrity Prophet, but a servant of the gospel? In the book of Romans 8:7… “because the mind of the flesh is enmity to God, for to the law of God it doth not subject itself (Y.L.T).”
The ministry (service) has no place for superstars and heroes, we (the believers) belong to the body of Christ not to a building, not to a movement, not to a denomination or an organization. Attending a geographical location faithfully on a Sunday morning or being proud of the celebrity status of your church and its leaders does not equate to citizenship in the Kingdom of God.
When looking for a place to fellowship with Gods people, don't be fooled by the celebrity of the leadership of the high-tech gadgetry in the building that others call church. I'm sure there are many who are reading this article, have heard a hundred times, "You Are The Church?". Far too many people will express their disappointment in a Leader after he or she falls. But we are God’s people, how is it that we are and at times can be so easily fooled? In many cases we have only ourselves to blame.
Understanding who and what the church is will cause you to realize that you can't sign in, you must be Born again and keeping a close walk with the Savior won’t allow you to be taken advantage of by the “wolves in sheep’s clothing”.

Excellence: Personal or Capital?

Personal excellence is something that you can not pay for, but it will pay your the highest dividends over the course of your life. It takes lifelong dedication to achieve personal excellence, whether it is in your business, your job, or your personal life.

Achieving personal excellence is a worthy pursuit and should be pursued above all else.

**Building Your Intellectual Capital is Key**

If you want to achieve personal excellence building your intellectual capital is where you need to start. There are three forms that you can gain.

Developing these forms of intellectual capital takes hard work and study, but they will pay you in personal satisfaction and higher income.

Your knowledge, skills, and abilities is the first type of intellectual capital that you need to develop. This is gained through education, training and experience. This Type of intellectual capital will determine how well you perform your job and the value that you can add to your business.

**Tacit Knowledge**

Your tacit(what's inside your head) knowledge of how your company runs internally is the second form of intellectual capital that you should possess and further develop in order to achieve personal excellence. Knowing the different methods, policies and practices of how your business operates makes you very valuable to your company and hard to replace.

Tacit Knowledge is very valuable, especially if you work for someone else. You would be the last person they would want to let go during a recession.

**Build Your Ability to Get Results**

Finally, your ability to get results, will be the determining factor on how marketable you are and your income level.

How well you know your customers, your serve and products will determine your ability to get results to meet and exceed your company or business goals.

You can not develop this overnight. It does take years of dedication and training to hone the skills your need in this area. As long as you continually invest in yourself in this area you will be able to increase your ability to get the results you need and live with a spirit of excellence.

Commit today to develop and increase your personal excellence.

Community Empowerment Event-Jacksonville, FL

Here's a special invitation from our Community Partner-- Great Women of God Abroad to attend the The KARS "Reel World Theatre" & Pizza Party Tour & Community Empowerment Day in Jacksonville on October 11th! Only 60 spots available. Register today!

Challenges of Women working in Church Ministry

In these tough economic times many churches and ministries are tempted to scale back on planning events so that it won't put any added burden on women who are struggling to make ends meet. The problem is that this is exactly the time when we need to gather for fellowship and encouragement. Here is a "Top 10" list that can help women's leaders plan more effective events that are perfect for this tough economy.

1. Use your own members: Organize an event that uses your own members as the leaders. You can find different women who have specialties and have them lead small groups or you may have someone who would be able to teach a large group time. Look around and see who has a story to tell that others can relate to and go from there. You may want to gather several women and hold a panel discussion on a specific topic. be creative and allow God to direct you to the right women.
2. Reinvent the covered dish: Most often the cost of an event is largely tied up in the food. Keep costs down by either asking everyone to bring a dish to share or enlist a team of women to organize the different dishes you want to offer and let them designate who brings what. You could decide on a theme and plan the food around that.

3. Network with Other Churches: Find some other churches in your area and share or trade Bible Study materials with them. Your church could buy one study and theirs a different one then after you finish, trade studies.
4. Plan 1 night events: Schedule your next event on an evening so that your costs can stay low. You even start a little later so that everyone has dinner before arriving then offer a dessert fellowship after the program.
5. Serve Others: Remember that if the economic crisis has hit you hard then it has devastated many others. Organize your women to focus on helping others. Service projects are a great way to build strong bonds and show people the love of Jesus in a practical way. The bonus is that your struggles tend to diminish in the face of what others may be dealing with.
6. Start a Support Group: Offer the opportunity for women who have lost their jobs or who's husbands have lost their jobs to gather for support and encouragement. Let your community know it is available and you may be surprised at the outreach it can become.
7. Get Out of the Church: Take your Bible Studies out of the church and hold them in different homes in the community so that people don't have to spend much time or money on gas to be involved.
8. Decorate for Less: Women's events always have the issue of decorating. Go old school and use things you already have at the church or enlist different women to hostess each table and make decorating her table part of her duties.
9. Simplicity and Relevance: Don't ignore the issues that people are dealing with but rather plan a event to specifically address them. Make it a brown bag night or just very simple in all details. Offer topics such as how to dress, dine, decorate on a budget. Consider inviting a financial specialist to speak on practical advice in troubling times.
10. See the big Picture: Plan your events to coincide with other large gatherings like just after church or when the youth or children are already doing something. Take the stress off of women who are worried about being all things to all people and who feel guilty for taking time out for themselves.

These are just a few ideas. Whatever you decide to do, don't give up on ministry. Women need encouragement and support more now than ever before.

Single, Marriage & Ministry....Whoa

You are single and you have never been married, and God has a calling on your life for full time service to Him. You have a zeal for God and you only want a lady that has a zeal like yours to serve God. In essence you want a lady to partner you with a great anointing of God on her life also. This article is written for you. Enjoy reading and if you agree pray the prayer and write a comment on the article.

**TIP 1** Be honest with her and yourself

A lady with an anointing on her life for full time ministry is a person that treasures honesty and she is love with Jesus, someone that NEVER lies to her. A lady needs a husband that can lead her house and be the head, and if you are not up to the task it is best that you don't try and pretend that you are!

You can kid yourself and think that you are a spiritual person, but there were many spiritual people when Jesus walked the earth also, even New Age people are a lot more spiritual then many Christians.

If you are sold out to Jesus and the will of God, then by all means seek the hand of a lady with a calling on her life.

**TIP 2** Be Sold out For God's Will in Your Life

Don't kid yourself or God. To win the heart of a lady called by God, you and her visions for your future should be the same. If God has been calling you to go to Africa for years you should be pursuing that for God. You should not be searching for a lady who also has a calling to Africa on her life.

This is part of being honest with yourself and with her. In some of the very first conversations with a potential lady you should not be afraid of mentioning that God is calling you to Africa.

You should take the lead when you talk about where you are called. You will know the "right" lady when as you mention this, she is quick to tell you that she has also had a calling to go there also.

Paul said it is best that a man does not marry and therefore devote all of his time and resources to God. I agree, many men spend all of their earnings on a wife and family, and these men could have done a lot more for God if they had remained single.

Be prepared to go to Africa without a wife man of God! Do firstly what God wants you to do. Seek first the Kingdom of God and He might bless you with a helpmate.

The Lord God is a jealous God. He would rather you be single then for you to have a wife that hinders you from completely doing the will of God. God does not favor men and women that make an idol out of their partners.

A woman that has been called by God for full time ministry will see this zeal on your life and your passion too serve the King of Kings and this will attract her more then any romantic words spoken by you could!

**TIP 3** Make it clear that you want to serve God first in your marriage

Living in Africa can mean that you don't have the electricity of the West and toasters, jugs, electric blankets and all manner of luxuries of the West. To have a wife with a calling on her life fall in love with you means that you will serve God, no matter how much you have to go without.

Many people don't serve God in their life because the world is so attractive with its high wages and all that they can buy. But to have the servant heart of Jesus you might not be a person that puts much stock in the goods of the world and the life in Africa would not be such a huge cost for serving God for you.

Many women want to serve BOTH God and their families. But a precious women of God with a great calling on her life will care little for the things of the world and the luxury of the West. They will already be the women that Jesus and the Father speak to tenderly and you might find that they are quite old and have been waiting patiently for the man of God that has been promised to them so many years ago.

They won't be married once and wanting to have a second marriage with you.

***Mark 10:11-12 (New International Version)

11He answered, "Anyone who divorces his wife and marries another woman commits adultery against her. 12And if she divorces her husband and marries another man, she commits adultery." No matter what the world says, second marriages are adultery. So the woman called by God won't have been married once and now want to marry you.

No, the women called by God might even be in her forties or older, yet she would have always been waiting for a man of God. A woman called of God would not have settled for a lesser man of God to starve off her loneliness as Jesus would have been her partner for years.

No matter how many gifts a woman of God might have, if she has been married once and her ex husband is still living; she is not the woman for you. You have to be strong and prove you will serve God first and not her want for you.

**TIP 4** Be patient when it comes to God's will in your life.

Many people tend to march ahead of God and move and do things that the Spirit has not asked them to do. Having a website might be a popular thing to have if you are in ministry. But, you must not make a website UNTIL the Spirit of God tells you to move and do that.

Jesus only did what His Father told Him to do through the Holy Spirit. You also need to learn only to move when the Spirit calls you to move.

This may be very important when it comes to asking a lady out on a date. A woman called of God might have noticed you, but she may need more evidence that you are the right sort of guy for her.

If you are interested in a woman with an anointing by God, be patient until the Spirit gives you the go ahead to ask her out.

This applies to nearly all your decisions that you make and most certainly the big decisions. It is vital that you let patience have its perfect work in you. Jesus could have started to preach when he was 14 years of age, but he waited till He was 30 years of age, the minimum age of a Rabbi.

As a man of God, it is a tremendous responsibility to be called by God to serve Him full time and double as much responsibility for you to marry a woman with an anointing by God.

It is vital therefore, that you learn to move as the Spirit of God moves. If revival breaks out, you might want to go and check it out, but you must first consult the Spirit of God, as to if you can, and when you should go.

The Holy Spirit might want you to start another fire at the same time from your own ministry as the same angel that came to the first revival comes over and anoints you.

A woman that has waited many years for the husband that the Lord of Hosts has destined for her does not want to be disappointed with you with you making a financial commitment or some other decision "without" the Holy Spirit giving you the go ahead.

God does some of his greatest works through men and woman of God that have waited twenty or more years for their visions coming into being. There is just such a special anointing reserved for people willing to go through the refiner's fire and storms of life for many years before God raises them up into major ministry.

Only a patient man will win the heart of a very patient woman of God. An anointed woman isn't looking for clever talk; she is looking for well developed fruit in your life. Sure, she may "feel" the anointing when you preach or "feel" the anointing on what you write, but many men have the anointing and lack the fruit to sustain the sort of calling she has on her life.

Can I pray for you:

Father of Lights:

We come to you today and seek Your Will in our life when it comes to marriage. Father give us the patience to seek only your best and to do only Your Will. Lord lead us more and more by You Holy Spirit. Teach us only to move when we see You Moving. Teach us to become leaders and not followers. Lord anoint us to break new ground for you and bring into our life the fruits of the Spirit through the storms of life. Lord give us the wisdom to read and re- read this teaching so that we know what we need to do to win the right anointed woman to be our partner.

Father, anoint us, give us the power to do Your Will, lead us by Your Spirit and keep us learning the things that we need to know to do Your will in our life. Keep us away from distractions and keep us from touching those things that are not pleasing to You. Teach us from every medium we experience, and mentor us through the voice of the Good Shepherd and Teach us the Word of God from the Teacher, the Holy Spirit.

Give us the endurance to weather the storms of life and keep us from sin to the appointed day that we marry the lady for us.

In Jesus name we ask

Amen

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God's Best,

Sherell Edwards,Founder
Great Women of God Abroad, a subsidiary of
The Christian Women's Leadership Exchange